A Day at The Willows

I woke up this morning as I always do, 7 o’clock. I pried myself out of bed as I always do, with great difficulty. I had my assisted shower given by my daughter as I always do, a perfect 21 degrees with dove for sensitive skin. But today, in fact, I wasn’t doing as I always do, I was headed to a day centre. 

As much as I like an occasional moan, I’m often optimistic to trying new things. I’d noticed in my daughter something different, the root of her hair was meeting her ears and the bags under her eyes were flirting with the centre of her nose. She’d selflessly given up her job a few years back to be my full time carer, and although she’d never complain, looking after her old mum was taking a physical and mental toll on her. Although I rarely leave my living room chair, I somehow manage to often make a lot of mess, as well as constantly needing a cup of tea, or a biscuit, or the toilet, or the remote, a tissue, the list goes on and she’d agree! And as much as I like my own company, my own TV shows and my own chair, we discussed somewhere I could go to give her a slight break during the day, or at least time to get those roots done!

This may come as a surprise, but I’m not at all savvy with technology, I struggle now to even conduct a phone call on the landline. So my daughter, upon agreeing she needed a break, decided to dive into online research. I didn’t want to stray too far from home, nor did I want to be surrounded by a heavy volume of people. We quickly found ‘The Willows Day Centre’ website and had a good browse. Queen Camel is extremely local, the property is wheelchair accessible, it’s only a small group of elders similar age to myself, professional caregivers, 2-course lunch meal. All sounds great on paper, but lets see some pictures! She held her tablet in front of me and scrolled, showing me the smiling faces whilst members played games and did crafts. Okay then, give them a call. 

The process was very quick, a few forms were signed and I was assessed properly so the carers were aware of my capacity, and that led to today. I arrived at 10am, the centre opens at 9.30am, but I was reassured start times are flexible. I was invited to sit down, and was introduced to all the members. Much to my liking, I was offered a cup of tea almost immediately after my arrival. This bit of down time before the day really gave me time to adjust to my surroundings and become comfortable in the environment, it’s the little things when you get to my age!

Onto activities! I was apprehensive that my mobility would hinder what I could do at the start, I didn’t want to start spilling and dropping bits, embarrassing myself and becoming a burden. Therefore, when paint and brushes came to the table, I started to panic. I think Nelly, one of the support ladies, noticed something in me. She, in herself, has a warm aura and presence and she gave me a look as if to say ‘it’s going to be okay’. She pulled up her chair next to me and assisted me with painting, she listened to me babble on about my daughter and her family and not once did she interrupt or focus on something else, she truly cared about what I had to say. We then went on to play a word game with the whiteboard, which had us all place our thinking caps on.

Although she’s staff, Nelly was the first friend I made today, but not the last. When it came to lunchtime, I placed myself next to another lady, similar in age to myself. She appeared quiet, but like Nelly, had a positive demeanor and looked approachable. We scoffed down our delicious sweet and sour chicken and rice, followed by bread and butter pudding, whilst we chatted. 

After lunch, I felt tired. I’d been socialising a lot more than usual and had been using a lot of strength to paint. I noticed at lunch the centre’s extremely cosy-looking, living room style area, that had large reclining chairs and a big television, and was pleased to learn that this was where we were next headed. Upon sitting in the chair, I felt like a queen sat on her throne, being waited on hand and foot. The lovely Nelly and Anne, another caregiver, made us all hot drinks while Lorna, the lady in charge, popped on the television just in time to catch some news.

After 20 minutes or so, feeling rejuvenated, we began on the next activity of the day, making bunting. Surprising, I found this easier than painting, and thoroughly enjoyed choosing the colours of the fabric and stitching them together, something I was fond of in earlier years. I sat with my friend from lunch and had a good natter whilst sewing, I even touched base with Anne, who was extremely helpful and professional, especially when assisting me in the toilet, which is never a straight forward task!

Any place that isn’t stingy with biscuits is a place I’d like to come back to. I throughly enjoyed our break from making bunting, followed by a cup of tea and all-you-can-eat shortbread. I even appreciated the light 50’s music played by someone called ‘Alexa’.

And just like that, the day had come to an end. My daughter knew her appointment would run a little over 3.30, so I caught the CAT bus home along with some other members, which was no hassle and in fact, reminded me slightly of my younger days. The bus driver was kind and gentle and made sure I made it into the house safely.

Here I am now, plopped back into the chair I once refused to leave, feeling content, fulfilled and satisfied that I’d given my daughter a well-deserved break and had fun whilst doing so. A huge thank you to all at The Willows, I shall see you again on Wednesday!